"English" Names

Foreigners quickly learn that everyone in China has an “English name”.  People often introduce themselves by their Chinese name, quickly followed by their conveniently easy to remember English name.  This can sometimes led to some really awkward questions.  What should I call you then?  Do you prefer your English name or your Chinese name?  And sometimes their English name is ridiculous.  My neighbor across the hall wants me to call him Christ.  That is right, Christ.  Not Chris, Jesus (Hey-Zeus), or Christian, but Christ.  I avoid him for several reasons, his name being just one of them.  It made Christmas time very awkward as well.  I fear that Easter will be a nightmare. 

There are some other classic English names out there as well.  Some of the highlights: Zero, Cool, and Seamen.  The reasoning behind the unusual names is also priceless.  It usually makes sense in theory, but do to cultural and linguistic issues, something gets lost in translation.  For this reason, I remain hesitant to adopt a Chinese name, fearing some coincidental double-entendre.  Poor Seamen doesn’t even realize his English name “blows” despite efforts to educate him about the double meaning.       

I usually try to learn people’s Chinese name and use it instead of their English name.  How would you feel if some foreigner said, “Hey, your real name is hard to pronounce and remember, so your new name is Zhou.”  I, for one, would be royally pissed.  However, my roommate pointed out that there is a monumental flaw in my logic here. 

Most people are absolutely delighted when I use their “English name”, rather than their Chinese one.  My roommate pointed this out for me a few months ago, and it put things into perspective.  He said that it isn’t about what makes me uncomfortable or comfortable.  People have many motivations for using their English names, and I should follow their wishes and refer to them by their chosen name, instead of the one I prefer.  He said that at his old job, many of the Chinese staff didn’t even know each other’s Chinese names, preferring to exclusively employ English names in the office.  The phenomenon resembles the reinvention that many of us experience through adolescence.  Everyone had that one friend growing up who decided to arbitrarily change their name.  The phenomenon even extends into romantic relationships with the number of non-Chinese friends a woman has dictating her name preference.  And really, who am I to go against their wishes.  

Yeah, not knowing people’s Chinese names might make the email directory at my job next to impossible to navigate, but it’s just one of the unique aspects of working in the Middle Kingdom.  I am not the same idealistic office worker that I was when I arrived in China, and long gone are my dreams of preaching cultural self-acceptance to my Chinese friends.  If you want to be called Jeff or Stacy, whatever floats your slow boat.